Toby Chapter Twenty-Eight

Previously in the novel: West Texas tent showman Harley spent his life making people on the High Plains laugh and helping them out when they were in trouble. He lost his money in the Depression and after failed attempts at wildcat oil drilling. His daughter died which sent his wife into alcoholism. In their old age they clung to each with a love that withstood it all.
Harley and Billie fell asleep that night in each other’s arms. He stayed awake long enough to watch her face relax, each muscle calm, free of tension and anxiety. Not numbed by alcohol but purged through their mutual emotional explosion. He did not know how many more assaults on his nervous system he could endure, but for now he felt strangely free.
The next morning Harley left for another round of appearances: the PTA meeting in Spur, an oilmen’s association meeting and returning by the weekend for auditions at the Sweetwater Community Theater. How would he find Billie upon his return? Would another distressing encounter set her off into a new downward spiral? Harley told himself in the final analysis he would accept whatever condition in which he found his lovely Billie. He would deal with it.
When he put his key in the apartment door on Friday evening, Harley felt the door open from the inside. Billie was there, to greet him warmly.
“I’m so happy to be home,” he murmured hugging her tightly.
“And you hold auditions in two hours,” she added, a laugh in her voice.
“You could come with me.” His eyes twinkled. “I’m sure I could get you cast as Susie Belle.”
“Which show?”
“Over the Hills to the Poorhouse.”
A shadow crossed her face. “Oh.” She paused. “I can’t. You know I can’t.”
Harley shrugged. “I had to ask.”
When he arrived at the little theater, the auditorium was filled with enthusiastic amateur actors. They stood to applaud as he walked down the aisle, almost skipping. The director, a balding man with glasses, beamed.
“We are so pleased Harley Sadler could take time from his busy schedule to play Toby for us.”
He ducked his head and waved away the attention. “Aww, I ain’t been that busy.”
“Perhaps we’ll see Billie at one of the performances,” the director added.
“Yes!” someone called out.
“That would be wonderful!” another yelled.
“Billie hasn’t felt well recently,” he replied with a sad smile. He could not say anything more on that subject so he put on his best Toby grin and announced, “So let’s get these auditions under away! Let’s troupe!”
The theater erupted in applause and cheers. Harley waved his arms over his head and tried to keep the tears from his eyes. He did not exactly understand why emotion rose through his throat but he beat it down anyway.
Harley guided the director in selection of the cast and led the actors through the opening rehearsals before leaving for the final two weeks of the legislature.
As the final bills of the session were debated, Harley had a hard time focusing on the issues. They all seemed as though he had heard them before. He had such confidence when he was first elected many years ago. He intended to help the people just scraping a living from the land. Now he was an old man, and families lost their battles to keep their farms. They moved to nearby small cities. Men took jobs driving trunks or stacking grocery shelves and lied to themselves that they did not mind leaving the soil behind. They did not mind someone else planting the seeds and watching the plants grow.
Harley did not choose that life for himself but he respected the folks who did choose to tend the land. Now as he sat there listening to the same old arguments about how the state government was unable to do anything to help the family farms, he felt like such a failure.
Of course, everyone visiting Austin wanted their picture taken with State Senator Harley Sadler. He shook hands and smiled better than any other politician in the capitol, but he could not save a single family farm.
When time came for his vote, Harley hardly knew how he voted nor did he care. This was his last term in public office. He had no more stomach for it. And, as Billie often pointed out to him, the legislature did not pay enough to pay the bills. Harley was tired. He wanted to go home to his wife.

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