This special time of year is best spent appreciating all the wonderful sensations the holidays bring. One of the things that I have enjoyed the most in the last few years has been observing the American family. Despite what some may think, it is truly magnificent.
In May and October I tell stories at a local farm which creates five-acre mazes. All the generations come out to play. It’s just walking along paths through cornstalks or giant sunflowers, but everyone has a good time. Grandparents end up sitting under giant oak trees watching the little kids ride ponies and pet chickens, cows and goats. Parents have fun too but use the activities to teach their children to behave and play fair. The family which runs the attraction has grandparents supervising the entrance to the maze and making lemonade. The children help with the toting and selling bottled water.
I participate with a theatre group which involves all the generations. One woman talks about her “baby” going off to college. He’s six-foot tall, has a beard and plays the romantic leads in plays, but he’s still her “baby”, and I suspect he doesn’t mind at all. Other theater families cheer on their youngsters’ theatre ambitions, keep them humble when they have leading roles and encourage them to be the best chorus singer or scene changer they can be.
Another guy I know is at every baseball and football game his son plays in, and he lets everyone know how they went. Still another man planned an elaborate ceremony for his son’s eighteen birthday and encouraged his son to ask him anything he wanted to know about being an adult. No holds barred, no topic too sensitive.
I have seen the same families go through trials of illness and disappointments with the same unconditional love and support. When the troubles pass, the children are back at gobbling up life like it was a five-course Thanksgiving dinner.
Of course, there are the unfortunate persons who don’t quite comprehend this family dynamic, but they’re not anything new. My own childhood wasn’t exactly out of a Disney movie either. Anyone my age (and that’s pretty darned old) who claim children are less respectful and lazier today are deluding themselves or have really bad memories.
These families I watch from afar are of every socio-economic-political background. No one group can claim the virtue of family values, nor can one segment of society be labeled as less than desirable.
Cynics can say they haven’t seen this family quality around them. My suggestion is to get out of the house and try to make a positive impact in their community. That’s where they will find all the families that make us thankful to live here.